Is There an Unseen Hand Helping to Locate This LAI Genealogy (赖氏族谱)?
By Philip Tan. Revised 20 July 2020
This is a remarkable story how a friend of
mine, since year 2000, managed to find his roots and his Chinese ancestry.
This friend, who is a Hakka, could hardly
communicate with me as we do not seem to have a common dialect to effectively
do so. He neither knows how to read nor write Chinese. He does not speak
Hockien. I could hardly able to carry a meaningful conversation with him in
Hakka, Cantonese or Mandarin as I am not proficient in any one of them. He does
not know how to speak English or Malay. He runs a successful evening restaurant
and used to be the main cook as well. Before I knew him, and from what he
described about himself then, his lifestyle could be considered as one where he
was burning the candle at both ends. After his restaurant, which closed around
2.00 am, he would go fishing with his friends till early morning. This went on
until he was stricken with cancer at an early age of 32. Initially he wanted just
to undergo radiation treatment in Tung Shin Hospital (同善医院) here in Kuala Lumpur. One day, while waiting
with another patient from Sumatra, Indonesia for their usual treatments, a
lady, who was a complete stranger to both of them, approached them. Finding out
that they were undergoing treatment for their cancer, she advised them both to
take up Quo Lin Qigong (郭林气功) exercise to complement their treatment. She gave them a
booklet and a tape on that form of exercise. He was very skeptical on her
recommendation, but as there was nothing for both of them to lose, his new
found friend from Sumatra persuaded him to see what such type of exercise was
all about. One morning they did make their way to one of the many parks in
Malaysia where such exercises are been practiced. It so happened that my wife
is a practitioner there at that park (Lake Garden Kuala Lumpur) as well and
also serves as one of the volunteer instructors. The group of practitioners
there was mostly ladies. As a young man and to be seen with a group of elderly
"aunties-aunties" (as he subsequently related it), he was very
reluctant to join. However his wife, who accompanied him there for that first
time to that park, persuaded him to give it a try. That group of practitioners
also serves as an informal support group for patients who are recovering from their
affliction of cancer. The group would help each other is more ways than one. After
joining, he found the group so supportive that he eventually becomes a very
dedicated member himself.
After his radiation treatment he initially was
quite adamant not to undergo chemotherapy treatment which his oncologist had
also recommended him to do. My wife was one within the group to persuade him to
do so, which he eventually did.
He wife took over the running of his
restaurant and he himself gave up the cooking part to concentrate on recovering
his health. He changed his life style completely and the affliction also
changed his outlook of life completely. Having got to know him since then, I
would consider him to be one of nicest person one would ever come across in
this world.
At times, the group would go out for holidays
together and some of the times that would include my wife as well. Occasionally
I too would tag along. In one of such trips, some 13 years ago (2007), it
seemed that I had asked him where in China was his roots and which ancestral
village his ancestor was from. As in many such cases I had usually encountered,
such questions would draw a blank. I must have told him what he should do if he
wanted to find the answer. As usual I had forgotten about such encounters with
others. Quite some years later, while I was at the park where they practicing
the exercises, he showed me a piece of paper which is as attached below:
On seeing the paper and after consulting with my wife as what was written therein, I told him that that was all he needed to locate his roots in China and his ancestry. That piece of paper provided him the name of the ancestral village and the names of his immediate ancestors. As he subsequently related to me, it seemed that after my earlier ancestral query to him years back, he had asked his parents about their ancestry. His parents could not shed any light except to say the family had some sort of ancestry records but those were lost together with the fire that engulfed their house in Tapah, Perak, Malaysia years ago.
His father is the second of three sons of his
grandfather. He then sought out his elderly uncle last year, who was 82 years
old then, to see whether he would be able to throw some light on their ancestry.
His uncle vaguely recalled that his grandfather (my friend great grandfather)
had left a piece of paper for him to keep. After some searching his uncle did
find that piece of paper which is shown above. That piece of paper was wedged
among others his uncle had accumulated. What is also significant was that the
piece of paper carried an instruction to keep it carefully. With that
information he organized a trip to visit his ancestral village for the first
time from 24 May to 26 May 2014 together with his parents, his daughter, a
cousin and a nephew. During that trip he was presented a copy of his Lai clan zupu
(族譜) which is shown below.
I leave him to describe his experience that he had posted in Chinese in his Face book for which I extracted below. (The piece was written for him by his two daughters but dictated by him.) I also provide a translation done for me by one Peter Cheng from Texas, USA. The translation I had edited somewhat.
“请容许我与大家分享我人生美丽的故事
八年前
还记得Dr.Phillip陈博士曾经问过我，你来自哪里，你是哪里人啊？
我想了想，我竟然无言以对，就直接回答说我真的不知道。
然后博士说 这样是不行的 我们应该要找回我们的祖先。因为没有他们 哪能有我们的存在？
身为后辈的我们，应该要祭祖， 记住我们的祖先 并一代一代的传下去 让后辈也学会华人的传统。
当我看到我的爸爸的年纪越来越大， 那一刹那，我醒悟了。
我本身也是一个爸爸 孝顺是种美德 我们该抱着感恩之心寻回我们的祖先并拜祭他们
从那一刻起 我便开始了寻根之旅的计划 我与八十多岁的双亲一起飞去中国开始这旅程。
期间我非常庆幸地得到了许多人的帮助 在这我要特别感谢陈博士您
当然最后寻根之旅非常的成功
我真的找到了赖家祖先居住的地方
找到了赖家祠堂
找到了赖家族谱
找到了远在中国的亲戚
最重要的是 找到了城市中无法感受到的人情味
他们的热情 他们的真心
完全感化了我
第一次的寻根之旅非常圆满
回到马来西亚 我与亲朋戚友分享中国的旅程。
这故事竟然感化了我的大伯（也就是我爸爸的大哥）
他的健康其实不太好 行动方面也稍微比较吃力
可也因为他有坚定的毅力 他要回到祖先居住的地方拜祭他们
他坚持 他努力地把身体调好 这实在令我惊叹佩服
一年后 也因为大伯身子稍微好了
我再次计划回乡之旅
大伯兴奋地不得了
这回乡之旅
有件事令我感到非常意外
中国乡下的亲戚们得知我们回乡
他们都在当天都召集了全部人
包括那些在外奋斗打工的孩子们
有些特地从广州赶回来迎接我们
大约200公里的路程为的是与我们见面
上上下下五十多人围绕在一间小屋吃顿饭
我实在觉得太温馨 好感动
再一次
我们感受到了 浓浓的人情味
回乡之旅圆满成功
在中国的确很注重团聚 很注重拜祭祖先
百善孝为先这句话我会记住 这美德从我做起
把孝发扬光大 把孝教会下一代
这寻根之旅毫无疑问是我人生中最棒的一件事
陈博士 谢谢您
从心底里的感激
语言上无法完全表达
可我真的学会了很多
万分感激”
“Please allow me to
share with you all one of the most beautiful story of my life.
Eight years ago [around 2007], I remembered an occasion when Dr.
Phillip Tan asked me, “Where are you from? Where is your ancestral village in
China?” After pondering on it for awhile, I could not believe that I actually
did not know the answers. So I then replied that I really did not know anything
in answer to his questions. Then Dr. Tan said it is quite important that one
should know something about ones ancestry and we should search out our pedigree
lines linking our forefathers. It is because of our ancestors that we now
exist. Otherwise we would never be here on earth today.
Since I am a descendant of my forefathers, I felt obligated to
observe the Rite of Ancestral Veneration just like most of the traditional
Chinese families do. Further I would want to impact such tradition to my
children and from them to their children as well so that this aspect of
traditional Chinese family practice of ancestral veneration could continue to
be observed.
.
Watching my aging parents having had to struggle through life, it dawn upon me
that finding our roots would the least I could for them. As the father of my
own family myself, I believe it would be an essential virtue to carry on this
tradition of filial piety, respect towards our elders, as these are still being
observed by all traditional Chinese families. I realized that I had to find my roots
back in my ancestral village in China, so that I could observe the Rite of
Ancestral Veneration and to pay respect to my ancestors with my sincere
gratitude.
Right at that moment, I started to plan my journey of finding my
roots in China. It did not take too long in planning before my journey was
ready to be implemented. For my first trip I brought both of my 80 some years
old parents with me. We flew to China from Kuala Lumpur to Shenzhen, Guangdong
[on 24 May 2014]. Officially, we were on our way to begin journey of finding
our roots in China.
For that search of our roots, we were very grateful for the kind
assistances from many people. I would like to express my deepest gratitude to
Dr. Tan (for your inspiration, encouragement and motivation to embark on my
journey). I consider that our journey of finding our roots was a fantastic and
wonderful success.
We actually found the ancient living areas of our Lai ancestors
and the Lai Ancestral shrine. We also found the Jiapu/Zupu (of our Lai
Genealogy) and found my new living relatives around their village in the
ancestral homeland. We were deeply touched by the sincere kindness and
enthusiasm shown by the Lai people within the ancestral village; something
which I do not think that would be forthcoming within a modern age big city.
Such warm feelings touched the deepest part of my heart; a feeling that I had
never ever felt before. I am certain that I would be carrying that wonderful
feeling throughout the rest of my life. I consider that first journey searching
for my roots very successful indeed.
Upon coming back to Malaysia, I shared all the wonderful
experiences of the trip with all my friends and relatives. I was surprised that
those stories I related had touched my elderly uncle deeply. At that time, his
failing health would not have allowed him to travel far, even away from his
home. In spite of that, he decided that he too wanted to make the journey to
visit the ancestral living places and to observe the rite of venerating his
forefathers there. In order he could take on the journey, my uncle started to
force himself to adhere to a more healthy way of living, and to revitalize his
body and mind, hoping he would eventually be well enough to take on the trip
our ancestral village. I was really impressed and admired his determination and
the tremendous efforts made in the improving of his health. A year later, my
uncle’s health had been improved so much to a point whereupon, I believed, he
was ready to take on the journey of finding his roots in China.
Once again, a trip was planned to bring my uncle to visit our
ancestral village in China. My uncle was really excited about the trip. We flew
to Shenzhen, Guangdong [on 3 September 2015] to start my second trip of to our
ancestral village. I had informed my relatives beforehand in China that we
would be coming back again, this time around bringing my uncle for the first
time and my father again. I was very surprise to learn that the villagers, on
their own accord, decided to gather the whole village to welcome our arrival.
The welcoming party included not only most of the young men and young women who
were working in the field, but also people working in factories outside of
their village with some coming all the way from Guangzhou (some 200 kilometers
away). In all, we had more than 50 relatives to enjoy a wonderful get-together
dinner in a small house that evening. I was very moved by the feeling of love,
sincerity, warmth that was shown by our distant Lai relatives. Once again, I
were touched and melted in the warmth of such human feelings. It was another
fantastic and successful trip visiting my forefather’s homeland in China.
In China most families usually consider family reunion and the
rite of ancestral veneration to be a precious event to be treasured in the
heart and these customs are deeply ingrained in the way of life. We believed
that the filial piety (filial devotion and respect) is the chief of all virtues
within the traditional Chinese culture. I would definitely like to adhere with
such traditions. I would also like to impact upon my children and their
children so that that they too should adhere to these filial traditions and
ensure that they could be carried on forever.
I would consider my roots finding journey to be the very best
thing that ever happened to me in my life. Thank you, Dr. Tan, from the bottom
of my heart. Words could not fully express my deepest gratitude to you. I did
really learn a great deal during those journeys. Thank you.
Most gratefully, Lai
Yee Lon"
What is also significant was the side tales
regarding him. When he was stricken with cancer at the age of 32, he already
has two children; both being daughters. Upon his onset of cancer, having
another child was no longer within his reckoning in spite of the fact he would
love to have a son as well. Years ago I
had ask him about his ancestry which triggered his yearning of finding his roots.
Strange as it would seemed, a year after that his wife conceived and gave birth
to a third child; a boy this time. The birth was the first among cancer
survivors within over the 40 plus centers in Malaysia, where Quo Lin Qi Qong
are being practiced, whereby a cancer survivor could still conceive a child.
His son is now twelve years old and my friend is now 52 years.
I had heard many a stories of people, when
seriously searching for their ancestry, would attribute some mysterious hand in
guiding them towards achieving it. This case seems to stand out because of
these many coincidences.
1. Under normal situation he and I would never be close enough to
talk about our ancestry. We do not a common language which we could communicate
intelligently.
2. If he had not inflicted with cancer, he would not have gone to
that particular hospital for treatment.
3. If he had not had that one encountered the stranger lady, he
would not known about Quo Lin Qi Qong exercise.
4. If he had not made friend with the man from Sumatra who
persuaded him to give it a try, he would not had bother to visit the park where
my wife is one of volunteer instructors.
5. If the group had not being an informal support group, I would
not have join them for some of their outings during which I had pose that
ancestral question to him.
6. Had I not gone to my own ancestral village for the first time in
2007 and found my own zupu, I would not have develop my own interest in Chinese
genealogy and would therefore not likely to have pose the ancestral question to
him.
7. Had he not been able to conceive a son after having recovered
from his cancer affliction, he might not seriously consider finding his own roots.
8. He is the fourth generation here in Malaysia and had his great
grandfather not had their ancestral origin written on a piece of paper to be
handed through his uncle, he might not be able to discover his ancestral
village and ancestry so easily.
9. That his uncle is inspired to work towards a new lease of life so
as to make the journey to his ancestral is itself quite remarkable considering
the doctor had quite given up on him. In spite the of the 20kg gain in weight
(from 40 kg before to more than 60kg a year later), his uncle still looks quite
frail as can be seen in the photo below. His uncle is in the middle holding the
LAI zupu while is father is second from the right holding another zupu. The
scroll that LAI Yee Lon brought back to the ancestral village is at the
background.
Is LAI Yee Lon awareness and subsequently discovery in finding the roots for his extended family had come about from a whole series of coincidences? Or is there an unseen hand shaping his life and guiding him towards it? He himself seems to believe it is the latter.
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